First Post/ Careers, Futures, My Path

Why do people blog?
I think most of you guys (if you're reading) know why people blog, or at least why you blog, etc. I think its a way of being heard and releasing your thoughts into a place accessible by others. And you get to do it anonymously, and all that jazz. Well I've never really kept up with a blog though I have signed up for numerable, all with intentions...Well... I can't promise anything to myself (Since that is who I am pretty much talking to) but, I hope this one works out...because I think deviantART and Twitter don't necessarily accommodate my collection of ponders.

Okay,
So, first I'll detail a bit about why I started this blog, if y'all would like to come along for the ride, I'd be honored. Of course, at the current moment, still its too myself I speak, but after I click that posty button, the only way you could hear what I am saying would be to READ it! Like, I could say Hello Brian!!
Hi Brian =]
I'm glad you're reading.

For many this will make no sense.
But to the Brian's of the world, they will be part of a chance choice of names which included their personal nomenclature. And the reason I started this blog is kind of sort of because of a Brian. A very cool Brian actually =] A Brian in a band who plays fiddle and likes Photoshop.
RANDOM THOUGHT - I wonder if Elvis would have blogged if he had the technology, thus allowing his extensive amount of fans to have contact with him from the beginning reducing their dangerous euphoria upon seeing him.
I don't know if it would have, since he was the first man to shakes his hips on TV.
Either way. I started this blog with an inquiry. My inquiry is a bit complicated. But I will explain.

See, the people around me are looking at college/ university. They are exploring career choices and paths, educational degrees and certifications. And I am extremely proud of them. I have a friend, who has become really close with me with this year. Her ex-boyfriend used her. He obsessed over her and created a really unhealthy relationship. He threatened suicide when she didn't spend enough time with him. He did things to here I won't mention here and now in their rawness and plain awfulness. I know that you can imagine (and yes, I am referring to a crime of sexuality.) And you know what? My friend was suicidal herself without this kid and they were only teenagers, they still are, and she wasn't stable doing math homework consistently (who is?!) let alone dealing with trouble of that extreme. And guess what, the school didn't help her. She went to the counselors with her concerns and when the counselors brought the issues to administrators they had a talent in convincing her it was HER fault this was happening. The reason I describe all of this is because she is going to college next year. She most likely will be a lawyer with specialization in women's right. Unless she chooses a different path (specifically as an art teacher) then she was be a advocate to not let what happened to her happen to another girl. She will be the change in the system that advocates for people and places blame where it belongs.
I'm going to say something very raw right now.
A 15 year old girl shouldn't have to cry as a boy carelessly has sex with her and ignores the fact she is crying until he tires out. (No human should have to at all. No one should have to deal with that, definitely.)
One of my good friend's many career ideas is to be one of the figures who refuses to let that happen under the protection of the law.
Now, my point is, she is going through the certification to apply her personal strength to the professional world. And there are millions like her. Sons who's mothers died of cancer, who are going to grow up and research cancer. Kids who never got a good education as a kid who are going to be teachers. And I do have a purpose like these people! I know I do.
As you conclude your years in high school, are you one of the kids whos has one of those purposes? That can be turned into a career path?
I am.
But...that fact is not on the table right now!
Its in a pile in the backyard that I will excavate for the neighbors children one day in summer.
I have about 2 more years. 2 full, and the tail end of sophmore year in high school. I got inspired a few weeks ago thinking about my future...and it doesn't include college for a good while. Planning my college path now would be like planning my retirement plan when I'm 25. Smart, but...not exactly necessary. I can't stand school sometimes. I really can't. And those are the words of millions I know, trust me, I try my hardest currently not to gripe, but, I have fundamental issues with....school land. And I know there is a college out there I will fall in love with. But! Before I'm a freshmen for the second time, I plan a period of wandering. A long period of wandering actually. I want nothing as much as my desire to be a musician. Not the symphony kind in the dress. The bar kind in the jeans with my drummer selling T shirts. The teacher kind with the earrings. The kind who lives on the road. When I am a senior in high school, I'll turn 18 on April 20th. The following months I will begin my journey. I have begun it now actually. While people look at colleges, I am doing something else...actually.....
POINT!
Um. My investment in my future today is to start this blog.
Hey. its not safeguarded. At all.
But, see here's my goal. In the next two years, I will not do nothing! No, my lack of college will NOT be an easy way out. I said I wasn't going to college soon, not that I'm not a perfectionist overachiever. In the upcoming 2 years I am going to determine how I can be a traveling musician in the best way. Earlier I mentioned Brian. Brian is the fiddler of Enter the Haggis and while I read his blog about the difference between violins and fiddles, while simultaneously procrastinating my AP Global essay about Karl Marx' ideas on capitalism, I got an idea. I am going to contact Mr. Brian Buchanan, hopefully, and people like him, and ask them if they went to college, and what they do and try and add some experience to my craziness. Karl Marx said in the Manifesto of the Communist Party that even the poet is now the victim of the capitalist society. You cannot escape it. It is my goal to manage my own world, as my own boss, with my drummer selling my T shirts, to try and live a life on the minimum amount of money I need, doing what I love with the purpose of helping others through music. Yes. I want to be the entertainment. HOWEVER - I need to be the entertainment that sends people home contemplating the importance of peace and music. There are colleges that teach that! I must find one. But I don't have time to if Mr. Tillotson keeps making me write essays about communism.
When I grow up I want to be:
Enter the Haggis
Bob Dylan
Okkervil River
Joni Mitchell
a troubador
an unemployed peacemaker
a friend
a traveler
The Felice Brothers
Conor Oberst
Lucinda Williams

And my goal is to from the road, establish a strongly felt sense of
What I need
what I want
what's important
what's not
How to provide for a family without subjecting them to the wrong things
How to love someone in a real way
How to love myself
how to play the fiddle.

And when I feel like it, when i feel like I have my tools, I'll settle down, I'll come off the road when I feel like it.

And the whole time, trust me, I will be envious of my good friend.
And believe me, I promise to call home all the time.
But I feel like from age 18 - say 30 -- I just can't do anything else.
So put my harmonica in my pocket and get me a job at a movie theatre or a music store, and I must experiment with how this works out. It might not. But if it doesn't, then I will KNOW.
If it does,
then I will be me.

Love,
~!megan